AND ON TO THE NEW....

Well, here it is...2010

And I've been trying to remember something about the past to tell here. That's what this blog of mine is about, right?

Well....

What comes to my mind this morning is the first new day of 1980. That was..wow, 30 years ago! Good Lord, what happened to all the years in between...and why does it seem like it was just a few years back?

Ok, this topic was brought up a couple posts ago and none of us had the answer. So, on to what this is about..a new year, with new beginnings, and me, scared of what I'll do with it.

Back to 1980, the first day of the new year and me waking up at a friends house. No, not with the hangover like some had. At least not the alcoholic kind. But I guess in a way it was one...a hangover of life. And the realization of what I was about to do.

The night before, at a New Years Eve party downtown at the local Pub, I made the decision to leave my husband. The alcoholic, two timing, physically abusive husband of 10 years. This wasn't a spur of the moment thing...I knew I would eventually get smart enough to do it. I just didn't know it would be then. And I guess the fact that he came in with another woman...again, finally gave me the *palm of my hand on the forehead smack* that I needed.

I was actually working that night..serving the drinks at the tables. This was in a small town where we'd grown up and everyone knew everyone else. And everyone knew about us. But it was different back then. Women weren't as independent as they are now. And I had kids too...5 of them. So you just put up with life as it is and do what you can to survive it.

I think you get the picture without me going into all the ugliness of it. There are things I would rather not remember and drudge up anyway...serves no purpose. Besides, you can read the book if I ever get to writing it...

And the more I start thinking of this, of the decisions I made at that time in my life, and the consequences of some of them... I think I'll cut this post short and just go on to the rest of THIS new day of a new year! Some things just need to stay in the past, ya know?

But I will say, in these past 30 years I've make many more mistakes, learned from some of them, repeated others...one being married again to another abuser for 16 years...

 Tried to became a better person, and I think I've accomplished that, reinvented myself a few times, and finally like who I am. Getting older has it's advantages...

So, on to a new year filled with....ummm, new things! Great things!! Just not sure what they are yet. I have learned not to make too many plans as far as my life goes. Believe me, I've heard God chuckling quite a few times....

But the time to re-invent is needed again. Not me, but my life. I kinda like who I am now. But the economy crunched things in my life pretty good last year. And since it's just me now, I can ReLocate if needed. ReDo.. like I see so many cool women do on here with *stuff* and ReDream! I guess that's a word...is now (O:

And most importantly keep blogging, meeting new friends and sharing more stories. I guess if I have a Resolution for the New Year, there it is!

So, The first new day of the new year 30 years ago...Done, Gone and SO OVER WITH!

Now on to more and better memories to share another day.

Have a great 2010!