I'll be gone for the weekend but will leave you with this helpful information...hehe

 I've seen two shows lately that went on and on about how mid-life is a
 great time for women. Just last week Oprah had a whole show on how great menopause will be.. Puhleeeeeeeze! I've had a few thoughts of my own and would like to share them with you. Whether you are pushing 40, 50, 60 ,70 (or maybe even just pushing your luck), you'll probably relate.

 Mid-life is when the growth of hair on our legs slows down. This gives
 us plenty of time to care for our newly acquired mustache.

 In mid-life women no longer have upper arms, we have wing spans. We
 are no longer women in sleeveless shirts, we are flying squirrels in

 Mid-life is when you can stand naked in front of a mirror and you can
 see your rear without turning around..

 Mid-life is when you go for a mammogram and you realize that this is
 the only time someone will ask you to appear topless.

 Mid-life is when you want to grab every firm young lovely in a tube top
 and scream, "Listen honey, even the Roman empire fell and those will

 Mid-life brings wisdom to know that life throws us curves and we're
 sitting on our biggest ones.

 Mid-life is when you look at your know-it-all, beeper-wearing teenager
 and think: "For this I have stretch marks?"

 In mid-life your memory starts to go. In fact the only thing we can
 retain is water.

 Mid-life means that your Body By Jake now includes Legs By Rand McNally
 -- more red and blue lines than an accurately scaled map of Wisconsin .

 Mid-life means that you become more reflective... You start pondering
 the "big" questions. What is life? Why am I here? How much Healthy
 Choice ice cream can I eat before it's no longer a healthy choice?

 But mid-life also brings with it an appreciation for what is important.
 We realize that breasts sag, hips expand and chins double, but our loved
 ones make the journey worth while. Would any of you trade the knowledge
 that you have now, for the body you had way back when? Maybe our bodies
 simply have to expand to hold all the wisdom and love we've acquired.

Love who you are no matter...and I'll be back here in a couple days,

Keep smilin (o:


Parsley said...

Oh, girl! I can relate! Too funny!

Outstanding Stranger said...

Loved this post but you forgot "your eyes get so bad you cant see those chin hairs" LOL. Have a nice weekend. Hugs, Diane

mxtodis123 said...

Great post, my friend. Will miss you this weekend.

Kissed by an Angel said...

Love that!!! All true too!! have a great weekend!!

Grandma Yellow Hair said...

My goodness were you listening to me talking to my daughter on the phone telling her my troubles...hahaha
Very funny post but so true too.
Yes you do need to come visit...just let me know so I can clean house instead of mowing...hahah
Let me know how you are adjusting to your new life

Mumsy said...

This is funny but some of it is very familiar to me. :) Hugs!

Tina said...

Yeah, I'm not so much liking this whole peri-menopause thing. At all. And it's always frustrating when I realize that the size 5 body that I had in college and was so unsatisfied with is the one I now would KILL for. BUT, at the same time, wouldn't want to go back there. Guess I'll have to settle for size 14 and the hotflashes...

PⒿ @ $ € € ₦$ ₣®0₥... said...

Soooooooooooooo funny! I'm still laughing at the wingspans thing....