LOVEABLE QUIRKY PEEPS

6/14/11

MISHMASH...

This post isn't about the top...

Or the bottom.

It's about the middle.

The Menopause Middle!

Ok, MY menopause middle.



I've been lucky all my life to be able to eat whatever I wanted to. Even after seven kiddos I was skinny.
Pissed some gals off.

Really.

Got told by a friend once at a Little League game my boys were playing in, that women from the opposite town didn't believe I really had five kids. WHAT??? Seems they could have found something better to talk about....

Truth was, I HATED being skinny.

All my life I was S.K.I.N.N.Y.
The chubby kids weren't the only ones teased about their looks. Or called names...

Olive Oyl

Skinny Mini

Bony Maroni

Toothpick Tilly

Betty Spaghetti

"Don't turn sideways, we won't be able to see you..."

And a few more I probably didn't hear.

Then the teen years came...

Thought smoking would be cool.  Ya right...

Guess what.

Keeps you from gaining weight.

DUH...

Clothes never fit right. I always had to take in the seams on my pants. Even after sitting in a tub of hot water with them on, trying to shrink them! (did you ever do that?)

Then I hit forty,

decided to quit the smoking,
gained 20 lbs....in the boobs of all places!

Then I hit fifty, still not so bad.

Then sixty came to call

 and there went the middle.

Guess it's catching up with the boobs.

But WTH,

I don't have to sit in a tub of hot water anymore.

And really, who cares anyway...

More to love, right?

Whatever :)


Wait till you see the next subject...

mwahahahaha

6 comments:

Aunt Amelia's Attic said...

-chuckle- Me'thinks women need to come to terms with what Nature has in mind for us. Mid area spread, I mean.

~♥~

Busy Bee Suz said...

Boy, you have lots of problems. :)
Really, it matters not if we are too fat or too thin...we are never really satisfied. Right?
I had no idea you were 60. I had no idea you have 7 kiddos.
Who are you anyway????

CATIZ4PawPaw said...

Y ask Y!!!!!

Is that 10 lbs. in each boob for a total of 20 lbs. or 20 lbs. in each boob? I'd have to put all my bras together to make one for you.

I didn't gain any weight in my boobs or anywhere for that matter when I quit smoking. No, I don't want any weight either.

We have some of the same genes.

PⒿ @ $ € € ₦$ ₣®0₥... said...

As a culture, we're too obsessed with outward appearance, Jake. Where would I be if that's what I focused on??!!

You're gorgeous. For real. And you're a little shit....with big boobs. Not such a bad thing, when you stop to think of the alternatives. :)

My Grama's Soul said...

Good morning dear Jake....Glad I was able to download your post....as traveling makes this oh so difficult at times.

I, too, had the middle age spread but decided to try and lose 20 lbs or so...wanted to look a little better...but mainly it was a health thing. My physical exam with my doc was stellar in fact my cholesterol...which had been steadily creeping up dropped almost 50 points ...and I was also able to reduce my blood pressure meds. Hopefully I will keep it off....that is my plan anyway.

A big hug to you dear lady...will stop in when I can.

Jo

Pearl said...

Oh yeah the old hot tub of water, that was crazy huh? It's so much fun growing old I went to the grocery store today and kept trailing farts as I went quickly going to the next isle, me stomach ain't what it use to be. bwarf